where the hell did that last name come from?
my last name? i'm as italian as hell. everyone in RI is italian as hell. that's our thing. you don't want to go to the beach in RI because its nothing but speedos and back hair.

do you consider yourself "jaded" or "cynical"? explain.
i don't think so. i don't think I'm smart enough to be "jaded" "cynical" or any other sort of esoteric mindstate. I'm more of a "constant state of ignorant bliss" or "too lazy to care". once in a while, i hang out with smart kids too much, start smoking imported cigarettes, start talking about philosophy and drinking expensive booze. when that happens, you've gotta knock yourself down a notch and remember your roots — mustang 100s, pornos and bud light.

if a girl were to scream any other person's name but yours during sex, who would you prefer it to be?
her own. or russel crowe. i heard he screams his own name during sex.

suge knight?
it's true. i write about suge knight occasionally, but it's more out of fear than anything else. you never know what suge knight is capable of. messing with suge knight would be like giving your roomate's band a bad review — if you trash him, he knows where you sleep and he will probably do unspeakable things to you. i love the secret handshake and i love suge knight. end of story.

is it just a coincidence that "slatch" and "snatch" are very similar looking words?
yes, it is probably just a coincidence. just like the words "slore" and "whore" or "slass" and "ass". slatch.com is a family site. let's keep this g-rated.

beer, sex, or video games?
i have this philosophy in life that everything is a pie chart. everything is a balancing act. it's not a question of "beer, sex, or video games?" it's more a question of how to balance the three. actually, the goal is to find the right girl — then things balance themself out. i am desperately seeking a girl who says "jon, lets go back to your place and play nhl2002 on your big screen. if you win you get drink, if you lose we have sex." then you trick her, see… you drink during the game, then let her win. i have this all planned out.

what are 3 things people don't know about jon buonaccorsi, but they probably should?
oh, I see how it is. you've been talking to my parole officer too. fine. here's the deal: i can't hang out with known felons, i can't leave the state and yes, a few years ago there was an "incident" with a "doomsday" cult.
actually…even more interesting…
[the truth]
1) i started the site because i broke up with my girlfriend and was bored at the time. plus, i just got a promotion and my new job sucked (despite the miniscule raise). from the ashes of my life came slatch.com.
2) i hate it when people i know in the real world/see on a daily basis read my site. i hate my small piece of web-stardom, but i love meeting new people through the site and all that good stuff. i am actually thinking about starting a new site that my friends/coworkers/family members do not know about. i have been dating the same girl for a while and we have an agreement that she won't visit my site.
3) i need to get the hell out of RI. i think i'm losing my mind.

[jon posts semi-daily at slatch.com and uses way too many capital letters. he should also learn that we're not concerned with the truth.]