in the history books i will write: "2002 did not begin with a bang, but merely a whimper."

to top off one of my worst weeks ever, "the girl" decided to tell me "i don't think we should hang out anymore." she waited, of course, until after i went to rent a movie and after we cuddled and watched it. she waited all the way up to the point where i walked her down to her car and went to kiss her goodnight. then she sprang it on me.

"i don't think i'm what you're looking for."

what the fuck am i looking for? maybe i don't even know anymore.

as i sat there stunned from her announcement, she asked me "do you want to go to the bar?" i guess she just felt like she needed to fill that dead air up with something. who knows? all i know is that i have the most rotten luck on the face of the planet.

the snow we were promised is nothing more than freezing rain.

and i'm sick and tired.

of everything.