it's been a very busy few weeks at work with a few big projects landing on my desk, or threatening to land on my desk simultaneously. in fact, i went the entire workday today not logged onto AIM or jabber, not chatting with friends, as i am prone to doing throughout the day. i've developed this bad habit where i come into work and take the first hour or so catching up on news sites, or getting sucked into really involved IM conversations with paul and nathan. my work ethic has seriously suffered from these several months (since around February) with very little to do while at work.

right now, i'm actually having trouble trying to remember all the things that have gone on in my life recently. it seems like i've just been going pretty steadily since my last post. we've had several band practices (we're actually managing to get together not just once, but twice a week now!), several nights spent drinking at bars and hanging out with friends.

i actually had enough presence of mind to write last-minute emails to some friends of ours that we'd sort-of lost contact with, and they ended up hanging out with us over the weekend at the big 30th birthday party we threw for brax. so, it was really cool to get to hang out with our friends again, and it really helped to elevate the birthday party above our usual run-of-the-mill cookout get-togethers we've been having infrequently. and, of course, it also helped that payday fell on that week just before the big party weekend, so i could afford to have as good a time as i could handle.

and my sister ended up swinging through town on her way to language camp in (or near) minneapolis. so we were able to have lunch together before she went off to spend a couple months with a bunch of american kids speaking bad french.

oh, and another fun thing was going to see Final Fantasy on Friday night when wug came up. the movie really was pretty good, if you (as paul mentioned) can deal with the cliche'd plot, story, and characterization. but really, the animation was amazing. i mean, it's still obvious that it's computer generated, so flesh and blood actors needn't be afraid quite yet. in fact, probably the best part of the whole movie was getting to see the spider-man teaser on the big screen. i tell you, that helicopter scene just sends shivers of joy up my spine everytime i see it. the shots of spidey swinging through the city still look a bit too CGI, but i think that the effects in the movie are going to be excellent. now, cross your fingers and hope for a decently written story.

well, i think that's done me in for tonight. i'm looking forward to taking a half-day tomorrow, and taking monday off, making this a nice extended weekend. hopefully i'll be able to motivate myself and get some stuff done. wish me luck.

well, not much going on 'round here the past few days. did have a good time dragging paul around for his birthday celebration on Saturday, taking him to the Irish Rover (twice in one week for me, but i'm not complaining in the least), then to a really really crappy movie (antitrust). after the movie we went to one of our local semi-frequent haunts, the mag bar, but unfortunately paul wasn't feeling too well and we decided to call it a night early.

sunday was a pretty low-key day, paul and brax and i went to see traffic, which was (thankfully) a really good movie. didn't do much beyond that, as i said, it was a pretty low-key night.

i am extremely excited though, and i'm on the verge of just completely and totally geeking out, probably tomorrow or thursday. finally, after wanting one for almost 8 years now, i've purchased an Amiga 1200. so, after retiring my old trusty Amiga 500 a couple years ago, and being forced to use substandard, outdated Windows machines since, i'll finally have a useable Amiga computer on my desk. i realize probably no one could give a shit, but hey, for me, it's fucking exciting.

ok, here's a reduced calorie version of the post i attempted to make the other day.

( or, the story of the year 2000 )

other things that happened pre-bipolar:

started the year in the arms of a beautiful woman, who i ended up falling in love with, and who ended up leaving me a couple months later.
lost my job of two years at the local bookstore, because of my own negligence.
spent two months off work, before breaking down and taking the Kinko's job (around the time of bipolar's first month).

so, now it's a new year, i've got the perfect job, and i'm making good money. hopefully this year will be a little better than the last.

well, i'm back on the job today, after taking two days off for that whole birthday thing. thinking, yeah. i'll take two days off, come in on Friday, then have TWO MORE days off… well guess what? we're on a deadline. "we need help and you're the only man who can do it, you're the last man available, can you, maybe, work this weekend? please?"

"yeah, i guess."

ah well, this'll make it much easier for me to get next Friday off to go up to chicago and watch one of my absolute most favorite bands in existence, the monkeywrench. their latest album is pretty kick ass, btw, but i've long considered Clean As a Broke Dick Dog to be one of the greatest albums of all time. it's definitely in my (not-really-defined) top-ten.

hm. this week has been a little odd, both nights that i was off work, i ended up getting drunk (not wasted drunk, but pleasantly drunk). this is not like me. my friends usually bitch about me "never drinking with them." sad thing last night was i was drunk after only two pints of Bass. i guess i've become a lightweight again. well, we'll have to fix that.

oh, and i still haven't heard from her. i'm trying not to think about it, because, y'know, fuck her if she can't make a little effort to at least pretend she cares. lip service is all i've gotten (and no, not that kind of lip service). a person can talk about how much they care until the mad cows come home, but it doesn't mean shit if they can't make a little effort to show you. yeah, maybe she's busy, maybe she's got stuff going on. she could still take five minutes to call & leave a message, or just say hey, can't talk right now, but wanted to say hi. even that would at least be something. can't you tell i'm trying not to think about this? oh yeah.

seems like brian's been admirably picking up my slack around here, updating bipolar on a regular basis while i've been busy doing a bunch of nothing.

first off, thanks to the executors of the Sebastian Stirling estate for their birthday well-wishes, all the more meaningful considering their recent loss.

i've certainly had a decent birthday. can't complain too much. yesterday, i had my 90 day evaluation at Corvus and got a raise! if that doesn't make for a decent birthday, i don't know what does.

spent most of the day today lounging around the house in my bathrobe, as I like to do, surfing the web, pricing new computers. looks like i'm going to end up going the sony VAIO route. and as brian said, "they made the PlayStation 2, how can you go wrong?"

had a good dinner and good beer with good friends at the irish rover (with no horrible bitch waitress in sight), and afterwards went to the hideaway saloon with brian and proceeded to drink two more pints and play some really bad drunken pool.

and finally, i told you all that stuff partly to avoid thinking about this–
she didn't remember. not that i'm surprised, mind you, but after i, on her birthday, and after not having spoken to her in like 4 or 5 months, wrote her a letter and made the effort to rekindle at least a friendship of some sort, i had kind of hoped that she would. i guess she's too busy being the little queen bee, having all her little drones buzzing around her (-like i used to do-), and doesn't have time to remember the birthday of the person she keeps assuring is her best friend in the world. agh. enough of that.

i am a happy person, see :^)

**update 12/17/2004** signaldrench is no more, now there's newartillery