back to the road (and complete non-relevance, at this point)…

5/3 akron, oh @ lime spider
after our relaxing day off in new york, we hit the road bright and early the next morning, headed for the rubber capital of the world (har), akron, oh. apparently this is the home of goodyear, the blimp, and all that other scary business. we were informed that they used to have a condom factory in town, as well, but it went out of business.

anyhowways…we got to the club and pretty much loaded straight in. we were supposedly opening for two glam bands (who booked this tour? a retarded 10 year-old?), which was nice because they proved to be the butt of our jokes for the rest of our time spent in ohio. we set up on the stage and set levels with each other (in lieu of an actual "sound check"), and then bellied up to the bar to get some drink on. we ended up trying to watch a ramones documentary on one of the overhead tvs, but we couldn't hear any sound. that left us cracking really bad jokes with the bartender girl and eating some skunky pizza made for us by the owner of the place. it was pretty funny because he came up and asked how everything was…

owner: how is everything?
chris: mmmf….good…who made it?
owner: i did!
chris: oh? man…this shit is fucking great!
owner: thanks! glad you like it.
[owner walks off]
chris (to me): this is some seriously nasty shit…
me: yep. totally.

the show went really well with little to no technical snafus, and we stuck around to catch the glam bands, which were both pretty fucking horrible. there were apparently some end of semester "riots" going on down the street, so i went out to check that scene with a friend from the area. the "riots" ended up being a bunch of drunk frat guys hitting on nasty, drunk sorority chicks in the streets while the cops stood there and yawned. i decided to ask the cops what, exactly, was supposed to be going on…

me: so what's happenin' in akron, ohio tonight?
cop: akron? shit…i thought this was cleveland. hey, guys…we need to get out of here!
me: shoot for detroit next time, smart guy…

then we went back to the frend's house in kent to crash. the most disconcerting part of the whole akron trip was waking up in kent on may 4th. we ate at some breakfast place with a giant, shitty looking x-wing fighter out front, and then got the fuck out of ohio. yeah. that sums it up pretty well.

[setlist*]
*note on setlist: the little stars are actually dan's depictions of assholes, making the overall presentation…disturbing.