so valentine's day was a bust. but you knew that already, didn't you? paul and i both opted to sit at our respective homes, basically deciding that if the both of us got together, we would most likely start drinking uncontrollably. if it hadn't been a work night, this probably wouldn't have been a bad idea.

having just dropped out of a relationship, i guess i really have no room to bitch about my current state. especially since i was the one that broke it off. but valentine's day has just left me pretty down and feeling more alone than ever. i don't think i ca remember ever really having a good valentine's day. nothing ever tends to work out the way i wanted or planned. i guess that can really just be applied to life, in general, but you get the point.

kerry was asking me what i really wanted in a girl, and, to tell the truth, that's a pretty tough question to answer right now. she definitely has me thinking about it, though. i know i want someone to hang out with. someone to have fun with, as well as share those quiet moments of whatever. i am not going to get into a long-winded emo dissertation right now, but i think you get the point.

scary chance valentine's day encounter: i ran into the girl i liked my entire grade school career last night. this is the girl i wanted to marry from kindergarten straight through to 6th grade. we became really good friends after all of that, and even used to hang out when i was 18 and she lived close to the communal house i was taking up space in. we fell out of touch (mostly due to her being a little, how you say, "crispy around the edges"), but i still end up seeing her in the most unexpected places every year or so. last night was no exception. i was at our local little mart thing, walking out, when she kinda blindsided me and was like "hey! give me a hug!" i tried my best to give a nice, kinda shocked, very distant hug. you get the point. she showed me a picture of her baby (said baby is about all that pops up in our little 5 minute conversations over the past few years), and then pointed to a clever looking fella that was walking out of the store. she said "that's the daddy." which caused the gentleman to turn around, look at me, and say "fuck her. i did." like i said…really clever fella. needless to say, i extracted myself from that situation very quickly. i'm sure a good time was had by all.
meeting time total for this year: about 2.5 minutes.

it's valentine's day, and i'm sitting at work. basking in the clacking of keys and the hum of machines. no love for me, ladies and gentlemen…just the joy of work.

i'm glad to know that my friend ben is doing alright since he moved back to new york city. he's got a job doing web design for atlantic records, and it sounds like things are on an upswing. witness this recent exchange:

b3nlord: i like tv.
Transmission3000: i hate tv.
Transmission3000: it makes me do things like watch New Jack City at 2am.
b3nlord: i love shit like that.
Transmission3000: true.
Transmission3000: i just hate it when i have to work the next day.
b3nlord: i have to go update Rod Stewarts website now. (how weird is that?)
Transmission3000: awesome.
b3nlord: weird.
Transmission3000: definitely.

so…yeah…things seem to be going well. hopefully he's keeping it real on the rod stewart tip.

while i was out on lunch, i swung by the record store to see jim and pick up a copy of the clerks uncensored dvd. it has all six episodes of the animated series, complete with commentary, on a two disc set. talk about handy.

now i need to get back to being a bitter, loveless asshole.

here it is, the day before valentine's day. it looms over us single people like an ominous black cloud. waiting to send some devious fork of lightning straight into our hearts, striking us dead from sheer patheticism.

or something like that.

i spent the day deciding not to buy the guitar i've been planning to get all weekend. i'm not worried about the price or anything, it's just that the place i'm getting it is in san diego and i get sketched out about stuff like that. nothing but a conversation on the phone and a mailed check? nah…i'll take something here in town.

so about town i was. i went back and looked at the exact same guitar, at the place where i originally saw the model. it's $200 more there, but i actually gave it some serious thought, knowing the deal would be kept in town. i then decided to hit up all of my other favorite guitar haunts, looking for something comparable. i've been thinking about the "staying in tune" factor of a tremolo bridge, so i've kinda been leaning toward a standard bridge. i ended up not finding anything i liked at any of the places i checked, but i think i've got some leads.

so on the "brian making big purchases" scoreboard, we still have brian standing at a big fat goose egg. thank you very much, ladies and gentlemen…it's been a hard battle. i couldn't have done it without your help.

as i mentioned before, tomorrow is valentine's day. so please excuse me…i have a date with some radiohead and a few too many cold ones.

i could go on and on about how some aspects of my day were too retarded for words, but i think i'll keep that to myself for now. let's just say…yeah. something or other.

on the bright side of things, i got to sit in a meeting that was nothing more than well over an hour of attempted corporate brainwashing. ha ha! i tricked them! i browsed the web and played on instant messenger the entire time. you can't suck my brain out, you bastards! i will resist you at every turn…

i also got a pretty good promo cd in the mail from girlie action media. they're the pr firm that handles such class acts as el tigre and rainer maria. the promo is the new album by gwenmars and i'd have to say that it's pretty damn good.

and i got to have an amusing three-way internet chat with matt and paul earlier. on the company dime, of course. if this keeps up, it may very well end up being the highlight of my day.

i do believe, ladies and gentlemen, that is all.

another day, another mind-numbing day nipping at "the man's" heels, chasing that paycheck. i actually feel somewhat rested after going to be close to on time. let's see if i can keep it up…

we're still waiting on some entries to this here contest we're running. you've had all weekend to think about it, now get to work!

for those of you that have been keeping tabs on all the contests, lately, kenoki has added an entire new category to her contest: songs. i would just like to go on the record as stating that this was entirely my idea. sort of.

i'm off of work tomorrow. i don't have much to take care of, so you'll probably see me puttering around on the cam. we actually left them both on last night and all day today while we're both at work. this is a grand experiment in ridiculosity. no light = no entertainment value whatsoever.

geh. that's my word of the day. after doing my part to help paul set up his computer and burning a couple of cds, i was finally able to scoot off to bed for a whopping 4 hours of sleep. actually less. more like 3 hours and change. needless to say, i'm frickin' tired. fit to die. but paul is now well on his way to having a kickass computer, so i guess all is well. i hope he's still around by the time i get off tonight so we can play that delayed network game of dune 2000.

in the "oops i forgot to link to this site again" category: homestar runner. it's one of the funniest flash cartoons i've ever run across, not to mention very well animated. click and enjoy.

once again, don't forget to enter our contest. we're gonna keep drilling this thing home until we get some entries (yes, i know this is a time consuming contest that takes a bit of effort…), so start entering now to try to get us to shut up about it.

i don't know about you, but i'm gonna take a nap…

i've finally paid off my sleep debt for the week. like matt has mentioned previously, i have problems getting to bed on time. i always get home saying "i'm going to hit my mark. i have a strict bedtime tonight," and it never happens. hell…i was off yesterday and i had to get up early. waiting on a cable guy that didn't come until damn near 2pm. when they say "anywhere from 11-2," that means "as close to 2 as you can imagine. maybe later…"

we ended up not going to the hockey game last night. we were all fired up about it, but some personal differences came up, so we decided not to. my friend scott called and after talking to him, paul and i decided that we should go see hannibal, instead. so we waited for scott, and once he got here, we headed out. we got to the theatre and got a bitchin' parking spot, only to get into the place to find out that the damn thing was sold out. not wanting to wait another two hours to catch a movie that we can see any time, probably in less cramped conditions, we opted to head back home.

cable really started kicking our asses when we got back. gary oldman was on the dennis miller show…we watched some good comedy special…and then we watched cruel intentions. it's amazing…i've lived for so long without television that anything with the slightest interest value sucks my ass to the couch like a vacuum. damn the man and his time killing inventions…

i'm sitting at home waiting on some strange dude in an angels ballcap to install cable in virtually every room of the apartment. soon we will have 30 billion channels, running straight into our brains. we may never see the sun again. and i thought the playstation 2 was bad…

don't forget to enter our contest. there have been various rumblings on the horizon by people who are wanting to enter, so get movin', peeps. don't let us down…

in the "website that i looked at a long time ago and thought was neat, but didn't bookmark it so i forgot all about it" category: kenoki. i'm really diggin' on that green, man…let's hope she enters the contest.

we're supposed to go catch a hockey game sometime tonight. hopefully matt will leave work sometime before we're supposed to head out. he has a habit of staying overlong at his ol' workplace, and tonight's not the night for that habit to start kickin' into effect, if you know what i mean.

and to wrap up, i'd like to thank everyone who has been helping my cam whup the ass over there at the makeout club on their webcam survivor thing. some pasty chick tried showing her double-wide on the cam for the shock vote, but it looks like we shut her down. score one for democracy (and good taste).

so…there was just a fire on the fourth floor of my building. this was an interesting midday diversion here at work. i can honestly say that it was a very welcome change of pace. we stood around in the parking lot, wondering if the building was going to blow up. isn't that always where your thoughts run when you're standing around on a nice day, waiting for your building to burn down?

i found this interesting website by an indie rocker in the far away land of hong kong. it's always interesting to see how widespread this indie-rock thing really is.

i am starting to pull ahead in the cam race over at the makeout club. that doesn't mean you have to stop voting. as can be witnessed by my sudden surge to first, anything can happen…

i've been really pleased to discover that they opened a new double dragon really close to where i work. i used to go to the original all the time when i lived across town. it's a comfort to know that i can't taste the difference between the two locations. the lo mein is just as greasy and tasty as i remember it. i'll have mine with extra msg!

yeah yeah yeah…i'll shut up now.